Thoughts from Places Edition: Jacksonville

Thoughts from Places Edition

Wednesday morning around 2am I arrived at Easton’s home in Jacksonville, FL. After chatting and watching Youtube videos with him I finally tried to fall asleep around 3am although his cat, who wanted to snuggle with me on the couch but who would refuse to lay still kept me up till about 4am when Zorro, the cat, finally decided that maybe snuggling me wasn’t in his best interest. My phone alarm went off around 5:40 which meant I pressed snooze and didn’t wake up to around 6am which was bad because I needed to be leaving the house at 6. I called Easton who said before bed that he may or may not go to the beach with me to learn that he was too tired to be bothered to go. I, tired from driving all night, hoped in my car and stopped by Dunkin Donuts before beginning my twenty minute drive to the beach. While I was driving I couldn’t help but wonder why in the world I was doing this, depriving myself of sleep, driving 14hours, and spending money on gas that I could use for something else, to simply see the sun rise. I mean, let’s be honest, it really only is a sunrise that last for maybe twenty minutes. As my thoughts continued to mock my actions, I finally reached the beach needlessly fearing that I was too late and the sun had already risen and parked in an incredibly residential neighborhood that I probably had no business parking in (I parked in front of someone’s home, but some random stranger jogging by told me it was public parking). I walked a block to the beach with a towel under my arm, obnoxiously loud keys dangling from my wrist, my mocha late in one hand and my cell phone (in case of creepers) in my other hand. The boardwalk to the beach that protects the sea oats from deathly stompings was shorter than I expected, but then again the beach itself was narrower than I expected. The beaches in Gulf Shores are wide, making the hike from a parking lot to the water’s edge feel like eternity when the hot sand is burning your feet, but the beach almost always declines sharply right before it meets the water. The Jax beach was terribly narrow even with the tide out and hardly had a slope at all as it reached the water, it was almost completely level. (I couldn’t help but think the insurance on the beach homes behind me had to be extremely expensive because they were not on pilings and it wouldn’t take much water to flood the beach that was so narrow and without an incline to speak of.) The edge of the water looked like a silk sheet slightly rolling in a soft breeze while looking perfectly still at the point where it touched and became one with the sky. I have to admit I was disappointed by the few scattered clouds in the sky because they prevented me from seeing the sun creep over the edge of the world and polishing  the water to reflect hues of red, yellow, and pink all at once. The clouds were far away in the horizon so I was still able to see the sun rise over the tops of the clouds making them come alive as their tips burned bright coppers and gold and looked like streams of molten metals. While watching this unfold several miles away from where I was standing, I couldn’t help but to be happy and glad that I was experiencing this alone, that no one I knew was with me in person or via my cell phone though I had to fight the urge to call people or send them the pictures I was taking of the sky. I do not know what was so special about my trip that made me glad I did it and did it alone for I invited several people to come with me and Easton had almost gone to the beach with me but no one came. The people, my friends and Easton’s restaurant people, all thought I was more or less crazy for driving so much for so little time at my destination. (I arrived at 2am and left before noon). Alex called me stupid and everyone Easton introduced me to at the restaurant (his dad owned it) were shocked that I had driven all that way to spend so little time in Jax and they were shocked that it was all only to see the sunrise.

Standing there on the beach that held nothing at all familiar I was happy to be alone and satisfied in my ability to accomplish my dream regardless if anyone wanted to be a part of it. I think the only person that I would have wanted to share it with would have been someone who had the same dream, not just someone who was accompanying me on my dream, someone following their own desires to accomplish their own dream.

The sun rose, I walked along the shore, collected a few beautiful and almost perfect shells and drove back to Easton’s house to take a nap before we went to brunch and I drove several hours back home.